Anger, Grief, and Love

My mom told me that she feels mad at my dad.  A normal response in the grieving process.  That conversation triggered a conversation I had with my husband a long time ago.  I told him that I felt like someone had died, and that someone was him.  And, in truth, the him I know was missing for quite a while.  If you consider anger for … Continue reading Anger, Grief, and Love


I didn’t think about the OW for over a week, maybe several, a new record for me.  Unfortunately it took the death of my dad to get there.  But, I forgot about her….completely.  Ironically, I would rather think of anything than losing my dad, thinking of her would be welcome right now.  Thinking about the affair would be preferable.  But, for some reason, even the … Continue reading Distraction


My dad died.  Those are heavy words.  The funeral is tomorrow.  I have no idea how I feel.  Lost I guess.  I don’t even know why I came here to say these words.  This place is my safe place I guess.  This is the place where I can be vulnerable.  And maybe this is the place where the only other deep pain I have ever … Continue reading Lost

Quantum Entanglement

You’re probably reading my title and thinking what the heck is that!  This is a term my husband introduced me to this past weekend as we were traveling back home over a several hour drive.  It sounds “spacey” doesn’t it?  Well, that’s because it is spacey.  And you’re probably wondering what this could possibly have to do with adultery.  Maybe nothing and maybe a lot. … Continue reading Quantum Entanglement

The preacher said he was a good man

One of my friends posted the two black Cadillacs video on Facebook today.  I watched it.  I haven’t seen that video in a long time.  And then it triggered a memory.  I remembered my son making his status “the preacher said he was a good man, and his brother said he was a good friend”.  I actually used the Facebook search and it came right … Continue reading The preacher said he was a good man

Where to find happiness

In the many of my husband’s surprise moves while healing from his affair, perhaps his instructions on where to find happiness surprised me the most.  Let me preface this by saying that Bobbie had him convinced that he must search for happiness because he didn’t have that elusive feeling where he was.  Happiness became the aloof for my husband while he was with Bobbie.  I … Continue reading Where to find happiness