My husband and I have a conversation scheduled. I think without actually saying it to each other, it will be the last time we ever talk about her or the affair again. It’s funny, because I’m not sure how I feel about the possibility that we would never speak of her again, well, at least not in conjunction with the affair. Suffering is something that … Continue reading The Healing Process
I love writing at night when it’s quiet. I have a small reading nook in our bedroom and I can hear my husband’s quiet breathing, even over the television playing in the background. I love that feeling, it’s like I’m outside looking in at this scene from my life. My husband always loved deep in the night when he knew everybody was home safely in … Continue reading Little things
I took some time away from my blog, a mental health break. I was trying to think through my next steps, if there are any steps left. There are no manuals on how to work through and get past an affair. But, I suppose there are blogs like these that we can all share our stories. And, really, that’s what we all really want…to be … Continue reading Humpty Dumpty was Pushed
“Well your faith was strong but you needed proof You saw her bathing on the roof Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew ya She tied you to her kitchen chair And she broke your throne and she cut your hair And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah“ Whenever I hear this song, this verse always stands out. Most especially the part about breaking … Continue reading From his lips she drew the Hallelujah
I have told you all before that I think the universe is haunting me regarding her. “Things” just keep happening regarding her. It’s almost daily now. Some of them are explainable, sure. Some of them just aren’t. I had no intention of blogging today at all. In fact, I wasn’t even going to log in, but I had accidentally left the site up on my … Continue reading Her again
I have been considering closing shop on this blog. Maybe it’s not helping me any longer? Maybe it’s actually holding me back. I’m coming here more often than ever to write, but at the same time I feel like maybe I could come to full healing if I stopped writing and stopped thinking about the whole thing. After all, it has been over three years … Continue reading Unknown
My husband and I were in a deep conversation today about the affair and about opening up to each other. We had been having this conversation in pieces, because let’s face it, we don’t have the luxury right now of a full-on sit-down conversation with each other that doesn’t involve a sporting event. But, we were alone in the car together and found 10 minutes … Continue reading The smallest of words
I have successfully avoided going to the OW’s blogs now for a few weeks. But, today I’m feeling weak. She has not stopped coming to mine. I have no idea if I’m supposed to read between the lines there and assume she is trying to tell me something or she’s just tormenting me. I feel like the more I avoid her, the more she doesn’t … Continue reading Moments of weakness
We are told from the time we are small not to stare at the sun, that we will go blind. Despite those warnings we are all tempted, at the very least, to risk going blind, just to get a small look at the sun. We do the same in our life experiences. We know that it will not be good to look, but sometimes you … Continue reading Staring at the sun
I think the universe likes to mess with me. Maybe it’s trying to see how much I can handle. Or maybe it’s trying to tell me not to walk away just yet that there’s more to come. Maybe it’s just pure coincidence. Or maybe it’s just giving me things to blog about not even one day after blogging. Tonight the new mom “Bobbie” came up … Continue reading Bobbie, Bobbie, Bobbie
