I swear she’s haunting me

IMG_9396I’m pretty  open-minded.  I  have somewhat of a belief in signs and things happening for a reason.  I have had a few hard-to-explain occurrences in my lifetime.  I think we probably all have at some point.  But, I really do believe that the OW is haunting me.  Maybe haunt isn’t the right word.  Making subliminal contact with me, maybe.  It’s so hard to explain to other people exactly what this means.  But, in this last case, I do have proof.  I’m sure a fair amount of people would call it coincidence still, but too many of these occurrences have happened for me to not believe “something” is at play here.

I rarely let my kids use my laptop.  In fact, when I first bought it my husband told the kids it was off-limits to them.  But, I have had it long enough now that I admit I have been a little lax in that area.  I do occasionally let them use my Macbook.  So, a few days ago they asked me if they could use it to watch YouTube videos.  I gave in, and let them.  I usually have a lot of tabs open on my computer.  I have Facebook and Pinterest open all the time, along with Amazon.  I usually close out WordPress so that it’s not found by my children.  And, there’s always some tab, or even a few tabs, open of an FB article that I clicked on.

I’m really not sure how many days after the kids used my computer that I went through all of the tabs to close some.  But, as I was going through, attempting to close them all to do a reboot, I was carefully checking each one, in case there was something that I wanted to keep track of or go back to, I ended up on the YouTube tab.  The boys had been watching training videos.  Nothing out of the ordinary at all.  It appeared they had watched a Pokemon Go video.  Again, expected.  But, just as I was ready to close out that tab, something caught the corner of my eye.  The name “Bobbie” jumped off of the page and caught me completely off guard.  Upon closer inspection I realized it was HER, like for real, it was her.

Now her friend had sent me the OW’s wedding video a very long time ago.  I didn’t watch more than a minute or two, but enough to know that it was HER wedding  video that showed up on the right of the  boys’ training video they were watching as a featured upcoming video.  I froze.  I probably almost hyperventilated.  And then, opened a new tab to look up how to screen shot on a Mac, something I just couldn’t remember in my flustered state.  It took me six tries to get that screenshot I was shaking so much.  But, I wanted proof that I was not losing my mind.

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After debating for at least 30 minutes about whether or not to show my husband this (because I typically don’t like to bring her up with him, I decided I had to tell someone)  So, I shot him a text at work.  My fears were he would watch the video without telling me and a plethora of other fears that I couldn’t even think of.

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Of course my phone rang shortly thereafter.  And we literally had no time to talk that night because of an event with his company.  We discussed whether or not either of us intended to watch the video.  I was honest with him and told him who had sent me the video a long time ago and that I had watched a bit of it, but that I did intend to watch the whole thing this time.  He stated emphatically that he would not be watching it.  I even offered up to watch it together (which was not really something I wanted to do at all).  His exact words were that he really preferred not to ever think about her again.  Okay then.  I asked him if he minded if I watched it.  He did not.  I still haven’t watched it.  I don’t know why.  I’ve had plenty of opportunities, but I just can’t do it yet.  I really don’t know what my fear is, but it’s like I have a brick wall standing between me and it.  I get the same feeling anytime something about her comes up.  With the exception of her blog, I steer clear.  I don’t have a real answer as to why I’m still going to the blog, it’s just a personal thing that I’m dealing with.

This is just one instance.  The other occurrences are just weird things, like the turtle showing up or ending up with her perfume on me.  There are weird things with music and just bizarre happenings, that again, are hard to explain.   I’m just glad I got physical proof this time!  I’m also glad I have this blog to vent all of this out!

 

 

 

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11 thoughts on “I swear she’s haunting me

  1. She has nothing to do with it. Your computer is designed to store and save things you have looked at. Because you opened the video it got stored. Now, radomly, it brings up YouTube videos you have looked at. There might be a way to get rid of it.

    1. I don’t think so. I was originally sent the video in a private Facebook message almost a year ago, and the minute or two I watched it was on my phone. And the only place anyone is signed into YouTube is on our desktop computer. The Mac is mine and other than something on FB popping up, nobody has even been to YouTube on this computer, except when the boys had it that one time.

  2. If your phone and computer are synced that might be an explanation. I just hate for your sake that her face or name ever show up. I don’t know anyone with that name, and I assume neither do you, so it must jolt you every time. It would be nice if she moved far far away.

  3. Please don’t give this lunatic anymore real estate in your mind. She is a horrible person. I could only stomach a bit of her boring blog. You are a terrific writer and you seem like a very kind person. Focus on you!

      1. My Dday anniversary will be four years next month. I follow many blogs but I have never commented on any of them. I set one up for myself last year but I haven’t posted a thing. I’m married for thirty years. Something about your wonderful approach may give me the strength to finally start mine. Thank you soo much for helping me. 😊

      2. You definitely should get started. Writing about this was the best thing I ever did for so many reasons. It is extremely therapeutic. Sometimes I make myself write about things I don’t want to think about because I’ve found that once you address the deeper pain it really does help dissolve it for good! And, in my case, the added bonus of another wife coming forward and really that was the best case scenario. My husband really thought she had changed for him. And that stroked his ego. Once he realized she really couldn’t change for anyone, it was like a big balloon deflating. He has made a lot of realizations in the past few years. And, I suppose I have too. And it was all because of this blog.

  4. Ok, so I found this blog today, went down the rabbit hole chronologically and arrived here. And I just watched her wedding video. I freaking hate spelling errors when care should have been taken. Did anyone see that the opening says “congradulations”?

    I had to deal with a serial cheating mow too – who also looked like a dirty pillowcase. And it seems to me we are all about the same age and married the same amount of years.

    Her name is Colleen. Her last name rhymes with whore, conveniently enough. Ok now I’m going to finish reading.

      1. Thanks for the welcome! a lot of similarities, such a cliche. She was also the company mattress and looked like a dirty pillowcase. The affair was the first half of 2013, I wasn’t told til later. Much. No love, she just wanted to blow herself into our tax bracket. With the subtle, superficial charming support of my mother in law. Fucking mess. We’ve moved very far from them all, they all suck lol. Bobbie looks like a total asshole. Colleen looked like she bought all her cropped pants and fleece jackets at Walmart clearance. Wh told me she had the kind of plain look that made you want to bring her in through the service entrance. And yet… She came to family functions of ours, she never spoke to me just glared at me in her shitty clothes. Best part of her story – the part I couldn’t believe, but she wrote it out – is that she was first married to her husband’s brother, cheated on him with HIS BROTHER and then married him. Hee haw. And has 4 children. I’m sure holiday dinners with the extended family must be challenge for the place setter/seating arranger. I’m still pissed.

      2. I think that is what shocks me the most, my husband knew she slept around and with people in the office. And one of his partners actually pulled him aside at one point to reiterate that. But, you know, blinded. My husband did tell me that he felt sorry for her, and I’m assuming that was part of her master plan since she also seemed to make the other husband that we found out about feel bad for her as well. Speaking of clothes, Bobbie did a whole blog about clothes, with little innuendos about my husband, and likely other husbands. The funny thing is, she took great pride in the things she wore, but as the other wife so eloquently put it, she mostly looked like a frumpy old maid. She thought she was dressing the part of this up and coming marketing exec, but she really just looked old. Bobbie is on her 3rd marriage, and who knows how many partners. And if I know Bobbie, she likely has all of her past husbands being best friends with each other. She loves that feeling that she can keep them ALL on her string.

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