How many more are there?

Here I sit, days after finding out that there was at least one more family this woman destroyed, to wondering how many more there were. Knowing what I previously knew about this person, coupled with this new knowledge, leads me to believe there were probably many more. Many more married men that she preyed upon. I had said before that my husband was the last person on this earth I ever expected to cheat, and hearing those words from another woman tells me the kind of man she was looking for. She was looking for the good ones, the ones that would challenge her, the ones that she could add to her belt as the unconquerable conquered. I imagine she stuck to the married ones to make it easier for her. These men had other committments and wouldn’t be available to her so she could pursue other married men at the same time. Some of you have commented that she is evil or crazy. Maybe it’s all of the above. Here you have a woman sleeping with multiple men at the same time, sending them half-naked pictures of herself, and faking a suicide. Evil or crazy doesn’t seem to quite be the right words. But, what the right word is escapes me at the moment. And top this with a love letter that a teenager might have written and what you have is someone who I’m sure Freud would have loved to have gotten his hands on. Clearly her problems are deep seeded and go beyond anything that is showing up here on the surface. Normal people do not behave this way. Sure, people have affairs, but even then they are with one person. When I gave my husband all of this new information and he was presented with photos and emails, he was quiet. He read it all at least 10 times slower than I read them. It was almost as if he was taking it in, letting the pain seep deep within him. And when he was finished, he sat there…he sat there for a very long time. He did not say much even after that. He mumbled that it hurt. I’m sure it did. He was convinced for some time that she was genuine, that all of my accusations about her were not real. We fought about it constantly. The difference, I had no proof then……and now I had tons with dates, and photographic evidence to back it up. For the first time in three years, I was able to call her out for what she really is, with nary a peep of defense from him. It felt good to call her a manipulative whore. It felt good to say that I had known horrible people in my life, but at least they were up-front about who they were. It felt good to show him a picture that she had sent to another man at the exact same time she was telling him she loved him. It all felt good. But, no matter how good it felt, he was hurt deeply. And I do hurt for him. Nobody wants to feel duped or played, and she played him good, like a fine violin. And in reality she has probably hurt many, many more. And who knows why, maybe just to be hurtful, maybe just to see what she could get away with. I believe the sickest thing of all was that she met the other married man right here where we lived…as if she was mocking my husband…..having sex with another man in his own backyard, again, seeing what she could get away with. But, God works in mysterious ways. And I will be forever grateful to the person who came forward to tell their story to me. I was honestly torn about starting this blog, and I was certainly nervous about posting the address to the “other woman’s” blog…but now I’m incredibly happy that I did. I knew it all along. I feel somewhat vindicated and I definitely feel like I have found a little peace. I knew what she was and who she was, and now I have something to back that up.


11 thoughts on “How many more are there?

  1. Wow, it seems like you and your husband in different way have some closure and the opportunity to move forward and heal as individuals and as a couple.

    1. Thank you. I do truly love him, but there is a lot of pain there. I know he’s in there somewhere, I always have. I feel bad for what I know he’s feeling. He’s an intelligent, smart man who got duped by a marketing genius.

  2. Perhaps she could be classified as a narcissistic sociopath? The more that I read her blog, the more I think it fits.

    I looked up the definition of sociopath: a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience.

    The ten symptoms of antisocial personality disorder:
    not learning from experience
    no sense of responsibility
    inability to form meaningful relationships
    inability to control impulses
    lack of moral sense
    chronically antisocial behavior
    no change in behavior after punishment
    emotional immaturity
    lack of guilt

    1. I believe you’ve got it. That’s her exactly. It’s all mind-boggling, isn’t it? I forgot this blog. It was her first. There are so many references to my husband and probably others in this one.

      It’s a wordpress one as well.

  3. I know I’m a day late, and probably a dollar short, but I am new to your blog as of today. When I read this post I couldn’t help but shake my head. Doesn’t your husband understand that what happened to him at her hands was exactly what was happening to you at his own hand? He was playing and manipulating the person who loved him most the same way with lies and swearing it was over when he was still talking to her and flirting with her. I’m a little stunned. (I say this with understanding though… in my own blog I shared how my husband felt betrayed by me when I began proceedings for divorce after he cheated. I was confused how his betrayal of me was ok, but my “betraying” him was just wrong.) I haven’t met a man yet that really gets how badly they behave.

    1. First, welcome to my blog. This blog has been quite interesting, to say the least. And i certainly never believed it would be so life-altering. But, after he found out-well, within a short period of time-he did realize that what he did to me, she did to him. I still look at him though and wonder what in the world went through his mind, as everyone, even people in other jobs have told me that it was her reputation to sleep around. I just don’t get it.

  4. Wow! Your story is riveting…unbelievable! You have incredible patience and emotional self-control to use the surveillance techniques you did for so long…without losing it on him. It would have been unbearable torture for me!

  5. I know this an older post but I just seen it and wanted to comment. I went through this too. I ran into an old friend i hadn’t seen in years about one year after DDay. This friend told me she had heard what happened to me that she was sorry and couldn’t believe it! Then she told me how the OW was also fooling with someone they were working with at that same time! (The OW was working at the same place as my friend) She said the wife found out and came to their place of work and went crazy and the wife was the one who almost got in trouble. But once everyone realized what was going on the OW got fired as soon as they found the first excuse 🙂 she worked there less than 5 months and that was the same time my H was messing with her.

    Then about 1.5 years after DDay i had a woman get a hold of me and wanted to know if i would be willing to talk with her because the OW was chasing her H now and she had found out about me in her investigating and wondered if i could answer some questions and asked me not to say anything to anyone because she still hadn’t caught them. I was glad to help her. And i never heard from her again and i tried to reach out to her a couple of times with no response so Idk maybe she got scared or just left, I have no idea?

    Oh and a few months after DDay i found out things about the OW i had no clue about – this woman was also my friend and neighbor – the man she was living with who she told everyone was her husband was actually her brother in law and she has kids with both of them so they are brothers and cousins!!! I wish i would have found that out when she moved in my neighborhood! It’s just been too much to process and accept.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s