I could bore you all with how great this man was. I could tell you what a great father he was to our children. I could tell you that he was the last person on the face of this earth that I would think would cheat. To be honest, if I had to choose one or the other, I would have guessed that I would cheat before this man would. I would have bet on that fact. And I would have lost that bet. The fact that three months went by before I knew anything is mind boggling. I thought we were so close to each other that I would have noticed a difference. I thought that I knew every nuance and subtle change. I thought we were deeply in love. I thought the frequent sex and long conversations, and the kids meant we were in invincible. I was wrong. To put it in perspective, when I told my dad, his response was, “are you sure”. He was on a pedestal with everyone. He was so high up that a fall of this magnitude was far reaching, like a giant earthquake.
Since I had no reason to suspect him of anything, I didn’t. But, he got a new phone, and I was helping him with it, and I put it on my charging dock on my night stand. I don’t know why, I had never, ever even looked at his phone before. Again, no reason. I picked it up. A girl from work had sent him a song. That didn’t even send up a red flag, but it disappeared before I could see what the song was. His exchange email account malfunctioned and the email he deleted earlier appeared momentarily. I went and got his laptop. The email was not in his inbox. So, I went to sent….and there is where I found it, plus the incriminating one where she invited herself to his room on a business trip. He was smart enough to delete the inbox ones, and dumb enough to leave the sent. My heart was beating so hard and fast that I thought it would jump out of my chest. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t think, I felt like I died.
I confronted him, it was 2 in the morning. He didn’t deny it, but claimed it was just a one-time thing, a blow-job, nothing more. Knowing who he was, I asked him if she was in love with him….he said no. I can still hear the no resounding through my mind, heart and body. I can still hear it because it wasn’t true. I’m not sure if he knew it wasn’t true then, or only realized it later. Life as I knew it ended at this point in time. Nothing could be ever the same again, but little did I know how much it would never be the same again.
Me finding the email on his phone is not how I really caught him. That was just the tip of the iceberg. What follows next is the real story of how I caught him. It’s so unbelievable that I had to write it down. I mostly am writing for my own sanity, and maybe for yours.